How to be Happily Married Happier

It's common knowledge for a while now that wedding industry players have practically brain-washed the public with their ideal projection of the wedding process.

I was surprised that, today, the following article appeared on Yahoo! Finance's front page, though:

Consider that the much-publicized cost of the average wedding -- $28,000 -- comes from a study conducted by Conde Nast Bridal Group, publisher of three wedding magazines and a web site. The study's respondents are those who had answered an online survey, responded to a magazine promotion, or attended a bridal show. Not exactly the population of brides at large.

"If a bride has been told, repeatedly, that it costs nearly $28,000 to have a wedding, then she starts to think that spending $28,000 on a wedding is just one of those things a person has to do, like writing a rent check every month," Mead writes.

Mead looks behind the wedding-industrial complex, including the Chinese seamstress who earns 40 cents for sewing the skirt on a $1,000 gown; the Cinderella coach and other trappings of Disney's "Fairy Tale Wedding Department"; and the videographer who encourages peers at an industry conference to double their prices, because "parents want the best for their children."

...

Mead also investigates a number of wedding "traditions" that turn out not to be time-honored rituals at all, but creations of the bridal industry. "The engagement ring was invented by [diamond producer] De Beers in the 1930s and 1940s," she says. "The so-called traditional bridesmaid luncheon, rehearsal dinner, pre-wedding barbecue, and post-wedding brunch don't have a basis in history. It's easier to say no to things like that if you understand that it's not wrong to not do them."

The funniest chapter in "One Perfect Day" is about the demand for contemporary vows from ministers-for-hire in a nation where 40 percent of people have no religious affiliation. Mead probes the origin of an Apache Indian prayer popular in wedding ceremonies -- and discovers that it was actually written by a screenwriter for a Jimmy Stewart western in 1950. While not authentic, it was apparently good copy, as the screenplay won an Academy Award.

When I asked Mead which wedding expense is the biggest waste of money, she demurred. "I'm not dictating to other people what to do," she says. "What I do point out is the ways in which different parts of the industry promote themselves as essential when they're not. They're very clever at playing on people's emotions."

Lo and behold, my stance on weddings jive with this article on the dot. In fact, I will adamantly refuse to pay big buckaroos if I ever plan on "walking down the aisle" and using the money are far more entertaining or more practical things, like a very nice, extended honeymoon, or a new business, or property, etc.